Eid and Ramadan

Ramadan was very different for me this year. Being away from Egypt, family and friends. When you live in a European city with hardly any mosques, one of the things you miss the most is the sound of Azan especially right before iftar, when hopefully and happily after a long day your fasting has been accepted by Allah.

I missed Tarwaeeh prayers at the mosque, especially praying in open air. I missed family gatherings at and after iftar and those special desserts only reserved for Ramadan like konafah and atayef. You can still have them other times of the year, but in Ramadan it's an entirely different experience. I missed all that.

You could only feel Ramadan in your heart here, amidst the wind, very long days (and hardly much sun), and everyone pretty much doing what they do the rest of the year. You go to work or your destination and all around you people are sipping their coffee or drink of choice, maybe even nibbling at a sandwich and you whisper to yourself: Allahoma eny sa'em. I'm fasting.

Days start as they normally do, no shorter days at work or school because of Ramadan. Try explaining how easier it would be for me if we had a meeting later in the day as opposed to very early in the morning. I tried explaining how my day in Ramadan works. I fast from almost 4 am till 9 pm. So I do my best to stay as late as I can to pray tahajod, eat and get up a bit later than usual. Good luck explaining that.

But that shouldn't deter you. Sadly, I know some Muslims who don't fast and say otherwise. Fasting is hard, this is why the thawab (reward from Allah) is huge. It's all about self-control, staying away from eating and drinking, gossip and sexual intercourse during the day. We absinate from food and water so you know what it's like for the poor. Like people in Somalia now. You absinate from sex so you can learn to control your urges, especially if you're not married. You obstinate from gossip because you shouldn't really talk about others behind their backs especially negatively. It's all about self-exercising, stretching the boundaries.

And then Eid came along: fresh and exciting. I missed having that first morning cup of coffee with kaek and biscuits among my family. I missed all that.

I've also missed my blog, but this year has just been insanely hectic. I promise to try and blog more often. I actually have many drafted posts since early this year that I never got to publish: about me, Egypt and the revolution. I'm still working on my current novel-in-progress and a couple of other writing projects, for everyone who has been asking. Wish me inspiration.

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